I was once the greatest pastor in the WELS, at least that is what a couple at my previous church told people about me. But then I did something they didn’t like. I honestly don’t remember what it was, but I think I disagreed with them about whether or not someone they didn’t like should be allowed to join the church. Whatever it was somehow, in a little less than a week’s time, I went from the greatest pastor in the WELS to the worst pastor in the WELS. I didn’t know for quite some time that I had fallen from the pedestal they had placed me on. I never heard it from them, at least not directly. But eventually the rumors of my fall from greatness made their way to my office and that’s when I learned my former cheerleaders were complaining about me to anyone who would listen, questioning my character, undermining my ministry, and generally trying to turn people against me. My greatest cheerleaders had become my worst critics.
My feelings were hurt. No one wants to be gossiped about; no one wants to have bad things said about them behind their back. I felt betrayed. I felt unappreciated. I felt mistreated. I… I felt anger. I wanted them to pay for their betrayal. I wanted them to feel as badly as they had made me to feel. So, I focused on their faults, failures and flaws. I said things like, “who do they think they are?”, “Like they are in any position to judge!”, “how would they like it if I started telling people about…” and then I started listing off all the shameful things I knew about from their past.” Thankfully this very unpastoral ranting, raving, and seeking revenge occurred in my mind; no one heard it, no one except my God.
You ever have something like that happen to you? Have you ever had someone you thought to be a friend gossip about you, talk bad about you in the cafeteria, trash you on social media, tarnish your reputation in the office, taint the way your family and friends think about you? Have you ever had someone gossip about you? Of course you have. How did that feel? Did you feel what I felt; did you feel betrayed, unappreciated, mistreated? Did you feel anger? What did you do with those feelings; how did you handle the backstabbers who gossiped about you? Did you rant? Did you rave? Did you seek revenge? Before you tell me how you handled the people who gossiped about you, let’s see how Moses handled a similar situation.
Moses and the Israelites had recently set out from mount Sinai. It was a rocky start. First the people complained about how hard the journey was. Then they complained about how bad the food was. Complaining was a common occurrence among the Israelites. They had complained all the way from Egypt to Sinai, it was not all that surprising that they would start the trip from Sinai to the promised land picking up where they had left off. While I am sure it frustrated Moses, I suspect he was sadly used to their complaining. What he wasn’t used to, was having his brother and sister complaining about him behind his back.
In Numbers 12:1-2 we read, “1 Miriam and Aaron began to talk against Moses because of his Cushite wife, for he had married a Cushite. 2 “Has the LORD spoken only through Moses?” they asked. “Hasn’t he also spoken through us?”” Miriam and Aaron get personal; they insulted their brother’s wife, questioned her lineage, and suggested that she had too much influence over her husband. They also challenged Moses’ leadership; suggesting that he was acting like a dictator and that the people would be better off if Miriam and Aaron acted as a check and a balance for Moses. In short Miriam and Aaron were telling people their brother was easily manipulated and was abusing his authority. It wasn’t true but it was what they were telling people behind his back.
When Moses heard what his sister and brother were saying about him, I am sure his feelings were hurt just as your feelings are hurt when people gossip about you. Which is why I find it so interesting that we don’t hear Moses ranting and raving about betrayal, or being unappreciated, or mistreated, we don’t hear Moses plotting his revenge to make them feel as badly as they had made him to feel. We don’t actually hear Moses say anything in response to his backstabbing gossips. It is of course possible the Holy Spirit simply choose to withhold this information from us, but that is not exactly His style. One of the things I appreciate about the Holy Spirit is His brutal honesty. The Holy Spirit has no problem pointing out the imperfections in our heroes of faith. Which leads me to believe Moses didn’t say anything. You might ask, wasn’t he angry!?! Well, I’m not sure that he was. In verse 3 the Holy Spirit tells us, “3 (Now Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth.)”
Ask yourself why you get angry when people gossip about you. You might say it is because they are breaking the 8th commandment; they are sinning against God when they gossip about you, and this is true. Gossip is a sin as serious a murder and adultery. But is that really why you are angry when people gossip about you? I’ll tell you why I get angry when people gossip about me. I get angry because I believe I deserve to be treated better. I get angry because I believe I should be shown more respect, given more honor, receive more appreciation. I get angry because of my pride. Is that not why you get angry when people gossip about you?
Moses was a very humble man, he did not think so highly of himself as to believe he was above criticism or complaint. He knew his own faults, failures, and flaws better than anyone. When Miriam and Aaron gossiped about Moses, I think his feelings were hurt, but I think his humility kept him from getting angry; kept him from ranting, raving, and seeking revenge. I suspect humility will do the same for me and you.
When Miriam and Arron gossiped about him, humility prevented Moses from ranting, raving, and seeking revenge, but humility isn’t the only thing that stilled his tongue. Moses didn’t say anything to his gossips because he was confident The LORD his God would say what needs to be said. In verses 6-8 we hear exactly what the LORD had to say to Miriam and Aaron. I’m not going to read it again because I don’t think we can expect the LORD to say the exact same thing to the people who gossip about us. But I do think we can be confident that the anger of the LORD will burn against those who gossip against us. Not just because we see that happening to the people who gossiped about Moses but because the Holy Spirit says to us in Romans 12:17-19, “17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.” As was previously acknowledged, gossip is a sin; a damnable sin, and as such the anger of the LORD burns against those who gossip. You don’t have to have to rant, rave, or seek revenge when people gossip about you; you don’t have to say anything because you can be confident the LORD your God will say what needs to be said.
Shortly after I learned what was being said about me behind my back, I saw my backstabbing gossips at church. My mind raced as I contemplated how I would handle them, but before I could settle on a course of action, they approached me. They greeted me with smiles hugged my neck and shook my hand and told me about a new grill they had bought. This new grill needed to be assembled and as neither of them were mechanically inclined they asked if I would come over to their house later that afternoon and assemble their new grill for them. I seethed. My first thought was “wow these people have some stones. They are gossiping about me behind my back and now they want me to help them???”
What would you have done if you were me? I’ll tell you what I did, and you can decide if it sounds like something you would do. I put together the grill. Now, I would like you to believe it was because I am such a good man, but the truth is I did it to make them feel guilty. Proverbs 25:21-22 says, “21 If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. 22 In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” I think I focused too much on the burning coals; I think there is a better; more compassionate way to handle a gossip.
After the LORD said what needed to be said to Miriam and Aaron, He left them. In verses 10-11 we read, “10 When the cloud lifted from above the Tent, there stood Miriam—leprous, like snow. Aaron turned toward her and saw that she had leprosy; 11 and he said to Moses, “Please, my lord, do not hold against us the sin we have so foolishly committed.” If you were Moses, what would you say? “The little gossips got what was coming to them.” Right!?! “That will teach them not to talk about people behind their backs.” “Get her LORD, get her!” That is not what Moses said. Those words are more likely to come from my mouth or perhaps from yours than from his. Moses handled his gossips with far more compassion.
In verse 13 we read, “13 So Moses cried out to the Lord, “O God, please heal her!” Moses prayed for the people who gossiped about him, he prayed that God would not punish them as their sins deserved but would instead forgive them. What do you think made Moses so compassionate to the people who had gossiped about him? I suppose there are several things that we could point to, but I suspect a big thing is the thing that happened years ago when Moses was a young man living as a prince of Egypt. You might recall the story where Moses saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of his own people and Moses physically stabbed the Egyptian in the back and killed him. Moses wasn’t just a gossip he was a murderer and as such Moses deserved to have the anger of the LORD burn against him. But the LORD God had compassion on Moses and forgave his sin.
The LORD your God has had compassion on you. Your mouths have made you just as guilty of sin as anyone else. You deserve to have the LORD’s anger burn against you as much as anyone else. But the LORD’s anger has not burned against you. The LORD’s anger burned against His Son instead. Jesus suffered and died for every sinful thing that has every come out of your mouth. The LORD your God has had compassion on you. Do you think you can have compassion on the people who gossip about you? Should they come to you in repentance asking you not to hold their sin against them do you think you could forgive them? I think you can. I think your feelings will still be hurt. I think you might even have to suppress your ranting raving and restrain yourself from revenge, I think you might have to repeatedly pray “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”, but I think you who have received compassion can give compassion. I think you who have been forgiven, can forgive.
I don’t actually want to hear how you have handled gossips in the past. If you have handled them as badly as I have then I assure you in Jesus, you are forgiven. I am much more interested in how you might handle the people who will gossip about you tomorrow or the next day or the next. I hope and pray you will handle your gossips the way that Moses handled his. Moses handled his gossips with grace. Moses looked at himself with humility, he looked to His God with confidence, he looked to his brother and sister with compassion. May God help us to handle our gossips with a similar grace. Amen